Most of us are good at solving problems. Sometimes, we even think we can solve other people’s problems. We dole out advice like, “Let me lay this out for you. First, you need to. . . . ”
This sort of direction can be helpful, for instance, when someone is trying something for the first time. But for most of us, receiving unsolicited advice isn’t particularly welcome. What’s more, it’s often not helpful.
The problem is that when we give advice, the other person